One year ago, my then 20-year-old son and I were driving on a road trip. It was the end of summer and he was getting ready to go back to college. He is a science guy—brilliant in biochemistry and engineering—but he’s also a great conversationalist on all sorts of issues. Like parenting.

Since I was preparing to give a parenting conference a few weeks after our road trip, I decided to solicit his advice. No, he had never been a dad, but he was fresh off of his childhood and was establishing life on his own. Maybe he had some advice about what kids really need from their parents. What should they do and what shouldn’t they do?

I prepared myself for an earful about the mistakes I had made, took a deep breath and asked him what he thought I should tell parents at the conference. “So, if there is one thing parents need to do to raise good kids,” I asked, “What do you think it would be?”

Without hesitating he said (as only a wise, self-assured young adult can say), “Oh that’s easy, Mom. Just tell the parents to behave.”

I was taken off guard. Behave? Maybe he…