According to U.S. News and World Report, 80% of Americans break their resolutions by mid-February. Perhaps you know this to be true because you’ve already broken yours. You snapped at your toddler, you got take-out for dinner again, your demanding work schedule is already proving tricky to balance with all your child’s classroom activities.

Something I’ve seen in parents when they set parenting resolutions is they’re aiming for perfection, and when you aim for perfection, you will inevitably fail. I still think it’s good to have parenting goals but set goals that focus less on short-term behavior and more on long-term results. When you do this, you set a great example for your kids as well. Instead of teaching them that goal setting is all about setting impossible behavioral goals no one can realistically stick to—such as a strict diet—you teach them that goal setting is about the long game. It’s about establishing and growing character, rather than adjusting small behaviors.

When setting your parenting goals for 2020 and teaching your kids to do the same, work toward answering these three questions. These are the questions every child wants his parents to answer.

“What do you believe about me?”

The minute…