Dear Dr. Meg,

My husband has been diagnosed with BPD, NPD, and low emotional IQ. We have one son who is seventeen years old. Our son is a great kid, but is very hurt and angry from the abuse we both get from my husband. I try to put good Christian male role models in our son’s life. I’m looking for advice on how to parent in this situation and at what developmental milestones our son should be. I am desperate for advice on how to raise a whole and healthy son! Thank you.

Signed,

Desperate For Advice

Dear DFA,

I am sorry that you are struggling with these issues. You need to know that you are not alone. Many parents have to help their children navigate tough relationships with a parent who has depression, anxiety or alcoholism. I also want to tell you that I have seen many children who live with parents who have these issues who grow to be emotionally healthy adults. So, you have a good chance of helping your son be one of those healthy adults.

There are some important things that you must do for your son. I will outline them below so that they…