All the Single Mothers, All the Single Mothers

My book Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters generated a mass of mail from single mothers demanding answers about some very important issues. So I am starting a six part blog just for you single mothers to address some of your struggles. You posed some great questions.

Are my kids going to be permanently scarred because their father isn’t in their lives?

The answer is up to you. Every child has a deep seated (usually subconscious) need to know who their father is and why he isn’t with them. Whether he left them at birth, during the early childhood years or even during the teen years, kids want to know these two things for several reasons. First, a child needs a primary connection to mother and father in order to shape his identity. Kids form their identity around the cues they get from Mom (female) and Dad (male) regarding who they are. If they receive cues from Mom alone, they have a void about who they are from a male perspective.

Second, kids need to know why Dad isn’t there. They need to know why he isn’t around because they believe (thinking like children, not…